RSS

Dear Republican Party

My father used to say that I must have been switched at birth because I was a Republican from an early age and I can always pick out the most expensive item no matter what the subject is. He said I needed to marry a Rockefeller. I used to work for an elected Republican official. So, here is a letter for the Republican leaders out there.

Dear Republican Leaders:

Why can’t the Republican party get its act together? Republicans are perceived as being wealthier as Democrats even though I don’t believe that to be true. If that is a given statement, why can’t the Republicans use their money to become a more coherent focused dynamic group in this country? With all the life coaches, strategists, marketing consultants, professional attorneys and doctors in the party, why does it always seem that the Republicans are scattered and unorganized?

Typically, the Democrats have voting early in the campaigns that selects the individuals that will be running for the party. Not so much for the Republicans. Democrats may fight tooth and nail against each other, using all types of practices that wouldn’t be endorsed by the average individual. After the primaries and after the official selection of an individual for the Democratic office runner, Democrats typically come together and endorse each other and cooperate for the better good of the party. Not so much for the Republicans.

Republicans don’t have leaders that stand head and shoulders above the rest of the packs, or if they do, those individuals are ethical enough and family focused enough that they won’t run for office.  Republicans are big teases, various Republicans that could run for office are standing off to the side and make people think that maybe they will, maybe they won’t run for higher office. Democrats tend to make it known loudly that they are running for higher office.

While having a sitting president as the “automatic candidate” for a party is polite, I can’t help thinking that is not the way our founding fathers intended. The current president’s actions, lack of actions, lack of presence in the US, lack of stopping wars, lack of stopping the Patriot bill, etc. and yet, they won’t run a candidate to oppose the president. As far as I know, there is no law against running a party candidate in opposition to a party’s sitting president.

I will quietly say that if Virginia’s Mark Warner had run for president in the 2010 presidential election, I would have voted for him. Some consider him a moderate, others a conservative, and he is likely a moderate conservative. He has a lot of experience running a company and he was a decent governor for Virginia. He seems to be a person of integrity. He may not be a person for all people, but I think he is a good person that can lead in the worst of times. As someone with a neurogenic bladder, I didn’t like it that he closed rest stops in Virginia, but that is one of the worst things I can remember about his term.

Having lived in Texas, I can say I would prefer Governor Rick Perry for president over many other Republicans. I think that would make a lot of people quake in their boots, not necessarily Texas boots. I think many people would quake in their boots if another Texan became president. You don’t mess with Texas.

There are no term limits for governors in Texas. I have read the longest period of time for a Texas governor is 7.5 years, and whether that is true or not, it shows that Texans are pretty logical and real. It could also be that some of the favorite Texas governors have gone on to run for federal offices, such as president.

Texas really does seem to be the republic that conservatives would desire for the country. I loved living in Texas and would move back in a heartbeat if my husband was offered a job there with a move package. We hope to be able to retire there.

The average person – Republican or Democrat – want lives that are independent, safe and allows you to succeed and make the life you want. The federal government has made commitments to veterans, to people who pay into social security, etc. Many people spend their lives or their working lives at least, paying into social security. It is not a freebie benefit like some Republicans would want you to believe. Food stamps, abortions, and hundreds if not thousands of other programs cannot say the same.

We want a conservative candidate who will make no-nonsense decisions and take action, and also be a compassionate individual. We want an individual who will uphold the Constitution of the United States for all people.

So much more.

One thing that I have found through genealogical research is that I come from several founding fathers and their families. I honor them on Memorial Day because many gave their lives in the service of their country and many lost all they had through service to their country.

 

Donald Trump for President?

Donald Trump is a very interesting person. Among other things, he is very wealthy, very well-connected, very involved in women’s issues (grin, beauty contests), runs The Apprentice and likes to say, “you are fired.” He has had wives, plural, and children, plural. He is due to be a grandfather. He has been associated with a long list of businesses in various states. If you want details, go online and read information on him. Remember fact checkers aren’t on the internet – and apparently not employed by major news networks either.

The Republicans shoot themselves in the foot when Democratic presidents are in office. There is no clear leader in the Republican party. The political party was somewhat left in a shambles after the last presidential election. In the eyes of many Republicans, McCain was not the preferred candidate and Palin was not the preferred vice president, potential president of choice.

The Republican party is still in a shambles. Try going to their website. The last post by the Chairman was posted last January 2010. There is no consistent front, etc. Rush is for the Republicans, maybe he should run for president.

The Tea Party has people from all parties in the many groups across the country. They are Democrat, Republican, Independent, Libertarian, all races, religions, etc. The issue is back to the Constitution, reduced debt, changes in government, states’ rights as per the Constitution – liberty and justice for all. Glenn Beck and others have encouraged people to step forward, read, get educated on the Constitution and the history of America. People taking citizenship tests know more about America than most US-born citizens. People have been encouraged to meet and be respectful. There are always fringe groups in any religion, political party, etc., you can’t judge the Tea Party by any of the people supposedly in the fringe (perhaps plants?) and you can’t judge Baptists based on the Westboro Baptist Church in Kansas.

Donald Trump is the only person stepping forward at this time to say he is considering a presidential bid for office. All kinds of polls are going on, focus groups, etc. The early bird could get this worm.

A lot of people don’t like Donald Trump for a variety of reasons. Some don’t like him because they believe he is obnoxious and full of himself. Maybe.

Let’s examine the fact that he is an established business man, running a lot of businesses and has overall been successful. Trump businesses have gone into bankruptcy in the past and he has bankruptcies in his background. Business bankruptcy is a different animal from personal bankruptcy, it is relatively “sterile.” Today Trump is doing very well. That could be a positive since he was able to rise from those problems, maybe he could help the country.

Bankruptcy has been associated with a lot of bad characters and shady dealings over the years. Bankruptcy happens. Sometimes you either take bankruptcy or you shoot yourself in the head. Bad things happen to good people. The need for bankruptcy doesn’t always result from overspending, huge debt load, too big a house, too many cars, spoiling the kids rotten, best clothes, golf course memberships, etc. That happens. Most people who take bankruptcy do so because they have had major financial hardships. They got “laid off,” serious chronic and/or terminal medical issues come up that suck up every penny they have, divorces, houses don’t sell and the values-to-mortgage ratios are upside down, houses have devastating things happen to them – hurricanes, tornadoes, floods – on and on. Most people who take bankruptcy would rather shoot themselves in the head than do it, but there is a huge burden lifted off of their shoulders when it is done. Taking bankruptcy is not a free pass. It makes it more difficult to do everything – rent, buy, get jobs, marry, etc. Going through bankruptcy can make you a stronger person and teach you the real value of life and things.

Trump has managed many businesses. Obama hasn’t. Many politicians haven’t had a “real” job outside of being politicians. Many probably couldn’t even manage their offices. We need someone with a lot of business experience and with respect for constitutional values and for our nation and for state rights and for citizens’ rights – on and on. Mitt Romney is an alternate choice and he has been governor in a very Democratic state – Massachusetts. I do not consider Mike Huckabee a choice at all, and yes I am a Christian, it has nothing to do with his religious beliefs.

Susan Palin is not a real choice, I have respect for her, she has been governor of Alaska, etc., but she needs to learn to speak without sarcastic remarks and overtones. It is difficult for me to take her seriously because I can’t get past that. I honestly don’t think she could win because I seriously don’t think men will vote for a woman presidential candidate for many reasons. My husband, like many men, can’t set his GPS to a woman’s voice. I called him on it and told him he might as well change the voice to a man so he would listen to it and he did. I heard the same thing about Hillary Clinton.

Trump knows how to do business with other countries, including China. That is important in this day and age.

Trump is a no-nonsense person or did you not figure that out with “you’re fired”? I respect that in a business person. I respect that in a real politician and in a president. That doesn’t mean a person can’t be fun at times, etc., but he has to know how to make hard choices and hard decisions, often quickly.  I would much rather have that than someone who flip-flops all over the place, changing details and stories, and not able to be confident.

In this day and time only very wealthy individuals can run for president. The costs and stakes are too high.

The press doesn’t like it that Donald Trump has the audacity to not answer questions and to tell them to pass, that presidents must be open for hard questioning etc. Has anyone watched the press conferences and interviews with President Obama? What hard questions has he been pressed to answer? The press hasn’t held his feet to the fire since he was elected. They haven’t questioned him on his flip flopping on issues and campaign promises.

It is past time for our country to have only two political parties, but the third-party candidate usually ends up fragmenting the votes.

Pray for the US and our next elections. Pray for the president and our leaders.

 

Federal Budget

Before I go into this, I have a new Mac, thanks to my husband, no more cracked screen to deal with.

I am a conservative, an independent but normally a Republican due to our two-party system. I consider myself aligned with most of the Tea Party sentiments.

I am against the trillions of dollars of US debt. I am against other countries owning so much of the US. I am against foreign countries owning so much US Treasury Bonds, etc. We do need to cut the debt, but there are so many factors involved with the debt.

We are in several wars. I state “several wars” because we have a way of slipping into wars in the guise of helping other countries. We were hit on 9/11 and I consider all of that as an act of war, no different from the attack on Pearl Harbor. As a mother of a son, I do not like war. Regardless of the age of your son, war is traumatic. I cried over my newborn son thirty-some years ago because I knew he could possibly go to war at some point. We needed to do something with the Taliban, but it is like fighting the devil literally because it is not a “country” and one place to battle in like you typically would.

I was against the Afghanistan involvement because I know history. Afghanistan is a harsh country and difficult to fight in due to the terrain, etc. The Russians didn’t overcome those factors. I am against involvement in “helping” any country in the Middle East except for Israel, for many reasons including the fact I am a Christian that stands with Israel and God still stands with Israel.

War spending has greatly increased the funding involved in the debt with our country. The infrastructure of our country is falling apart, it would take a lot more money to make all the repairs and improvements, this has been known for about twenty years or more. In our city, most of the water pipes downtown are clay and from around 1900. They keep breaking and all they can do is make repairs until the next break. The infrastructure is typically considered highways, roads, water pipes and structures and the sewer system and all the things associated with those things. Those are the things we take for granted.

The Tea Party and many Republicans want to cut “entitlements.” I am prejudiced because I receive Social Security Disability and it took attorneys and four years and a judge etc. to get that for the many conditions I have. I am prejudiced because I worked over thirty years and paid into Social Security all that time. Entitlements are “what other people get.” You are against them until you need them.

If we cut all the Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, etc., what about all the funding we send to all the countries around the world to help their citizens that do not pay taxes here?

What about all the funding for abortions in our nation and related expenses?

What about all the benefits the senators and congressmen get?

What about all the trips that the Obamas and their friends take?

What about all the assistants that the First Lady has?

There are so many “pork barrel” projects across the country that could get cut.

I am totally for the military service personnel and their families. I know how difficult it is to do what they are doing to make ends meet. I cannot imagine all these people that make three and four tours of Iraq and Afghanistan.

So, before you think about cutting all the “entitlements,” consider everything.

 

My MacBook Pro’s screen spontaneously cracked

I am typing on a PC instead of on my MacBook Pro.  It does not make me happy.

My MacBook Pro was on my table with the case closed.  I came back to it and I was shocked.  The screen was cracked.  The crack started at the right bottom.  It was not broken, dropped, etc.

I researched this on the internet and there are a lot of MacBook Pro screens that have spontaneously cracked.

There are the computer geeks who refuse to believe people have not dropped their computers.  I know I did not.

My computer was working fine until this happened.  Steve Jobs, what are you going to do about it?

 

Living with a chronic illness

I have been disabled for 10 years.  The physical problems I was having at work were too upsetting to me and I never knew what was going to happen.  The problems made my job as an area manager over two offices very difficult.  The manager over me did not like the instability that the new physical conditions were causing.  I was stressed out over the health issues and that created additional stress that showed on me.  The physical problems were disturbing to my manager.  I went through a period of temporary disability per a doctor, but that didn’t help.  I had no choice but to leave the job.

Depression accompanies chronic illness.  Sometimes it can be part of it, sometimes it is created by what you are going through as part of the chronic illness.  For me, not being able to do what I used to do was from the very beginning very depressing.  It is still very depressing to me.  Having the physical and cognitive issues were very difficult to me.  It is still very depressing to me.  Having new symptoms and problems continually coming into my life is difficult.  The doctors not being able to fully diagnose my problems creates more depression.

Many doctors don’t understand the concept that a patient needs to have a name for what you are going through.  It helps you to know what you are dealing with and what could happen.  It helps to know that other people have the condition, and maybe you can even join a support group for that disorder.  I read a study today that knowing what you have helps give a patient some peace of mind, that not knowing creates additional stress and depression.

Every person living with a chronic illness can tell you horror stories of what we have gone through dealing with doctors, nurse practitioners and assistants, hospitals, testing centers and staff.   Where I am currently living, whenever you go to a different doctor for something, he/she will disagree with the other doctor’s diagnosis and insist that he/she is wrong.  New tests, often repeat tests are ordered.  New therapy is tried.  This creates chaos and confusion for the patient.

Persons living with chronic illness will tell you we have to be our own advocates.  We know what we are dealing with is real.  While I want to know the name of what I am fighting, I know that what I have is real and I am fighting it every day.  Husbands or next of kin may help me deal with the situation at home, but they are not you and cannot tell someone else what you go through every day.  Even if you think they see what you go through, they don’t experience it.  Husbands also tend not to remember things.

I go through flares or exacerbations of my conditions.  That means that I may be getting along and doing pretty good, for what I deal with.  Bam!!  Pain, aching, extreme fatigue and more all hit me.  I am knocked off my feet, sometimes literally.  I recently went through over a week of living like this.  It is like having a bad case of flu without a fever.  I go through that many times a year.  I recently have had a bad flare of fibromyalgia.  When I get it bad, not only do I have extreme pain, aching and fatigue, but I also get lumps just under my skin at various locations in my body.  I have a very good massage therapist that I have seen for over seven years.  I headed to her and she helped me and worked out those lumps and trigger points.

I want to do all the physical things that others do.  I want to be able to hike and run, things I used to do.  I want to be able to clean and cook like I did before, and have a perfectly clean house.  I want those things.  I want to be able to work and produce a good income like I did before.  Why would I want to settle for half of what I was making on Social Security?  People who think people are on it to take a lazy way out, it just isn’t true.  I like being able to produce a good income and to do a good day’s work.  I never cheated any boss of my time and I usually worked well over the hours I was to work.  I didn’t like things to be acceptable, I wanted things to be great.  I used to be known as “Super Woman” because I excelled at what I was doing and I did it with zeal.

There are days when I have new problems and diagnoses, and it is just too difficult to deal with.  I get really down for at least a day and then I just go on.  If a doctor tells me they have found “something” on a test, and that it could be “whatever,” I am unemotional and usually stare back.  Yes I have heard him/her, but I have gone through this so many times that I know most of the time there is nothing, and I just can’t freak out.  I usually do the research on the internet, on reliable sites like Mayo Clinic, John Hopkins, National Institute of Health, etc.  I want to understand what could be involved.  This helps me to have a cognitive idea of what could be happening, but it also helps me to know what to ask the doctor.  I can’t ask the right questions if I am uninformed.

Relationships are affected by chronic illnesses:

Sometimes the chronic illness may not be “seen” when you look at a person.  It isn’t like you have a broken arm or nose or disfigured.  These are known as “invisible illnesses,” it doesn’t mean they don’t exist.  The illnesses exist but you don’t live in the body of the other people to know what they are going through.

If you do have physical conditions that can be seen or you have gone through something like cancer where you may have had to have disfiguring surgery, people tend to avoid you.  If you need physical assistance, many people don’t want to be around you because you will slow them down, make them uncomfortable, need things that they don’t want to help you with, or don’t want to know how to help you.

If you use an assistive mobility device, there are a lot of issues.  If you are getting a ride with someone, the mobility device needs to be able to get into their car – lifting it and room to put the device in the car.  Then you have to take it out.  Then you have to deal with parking, finding an accessible entrance, dealing with everything else.  A lot of places are not accessible, even if they claim to be.

Family and acquaintenances often don’t want to be around you.  Sometimes it could be a reason like you have a condition that runs in the family and they are scared.  They don’t want to see what could happen to them, or is happening to them.  Sometimes it is just more selfish reasons, they don’t want you to slow them down or deal with all you go through.

If you have a problem talking, eating, etc., it can often be embarrassing to be around someone who is having trouble.  I normally can speak clearly, but there are times my language is jumbled and uninterpretable.  I have had people who have doctorates with me at the time this has happened, it upset them and they had to walk away.

I can go on and on, and maybe I will another day.

Don’t judge people with chronic illnesses.

 

Facial Scars do Affect You

My complexion used to be perfect when I was younger, that is until I had a bad injury.

I was walking down the driveway of a home I was visiting when my heel caught in a damaged area in the driveway, a crack that was from some type of damage.  My shoe stuck, I didn’t, and I went flying – literally like Super Man.  I landed with my chin on the cement.

I had bleeding on the chin and some small gravel.  I couldn’t open my mouth at all.  I went back to the house, and I was led to their bathroom where I washed off my face and tried to stop it from bleeding.  I was supposed to return to that home that evening with my husband to a cookout.  Since I couldn’t eat, we didn’t go.

I don’t think we had health insurance at the time, or I would have gone to the emergency room since I couldn’t open my mouth.  I drank milkshakes and that kind of thing until I could see the dentist the next week.  He assured me I had not only torn up my TMJ’s, but that my teeth would all be cracked.  He had seen that type of thing before.

We believe in the healing power of prayer, that God is real and active in the lives of people today.  We prayed for a miracle and complete healing, and our Christian friends did as well.

I waited the recommended time to go back to the dentist to get x-rays.  He was more than shocked when I didn’t have one cracked or broken teeth and that if anything, my TMJ’s were in better shape now than before.  We knew this was all as a result of our wonderful healing God that hears our prayers.

I had scars on my chin that were ugly, red – even after they were “healed.”  I probably had some type of infection in the scars because even now, years later, I still get something like acne there, but it isn’t acne.  The scars are worse now than ever.  I had someone recently tell me that my chin looks like the injury was recent.

I have another scar on the side of my face that is from an incision that was made to remove a mole with an infected cyst underneath.  I had many doctors refuse to remove the problem for years because they didn’t want to leave a scar.  I was sick and tired of having the problem, and more so when it became infected.  I told the dermatologist that I didn’t care if it left a scar, it would be less of a problem than the large mole.  It was removed and I was happy.  Yes, I have a scar, but it is on the side of the face.

I have another scar that is under my left ear.  That is a scar from a surgery I had to remove an abscessed cyst in my neck, I had to have the surgery in the hospital.  It disturbed a friend’s young son when it was still fresh, it scared him and he asked what was wrong with me.

Years ago I used a very expensive cover-up “foundation” that was used by accident victims.  It was extremely difficult to get off, it was oil based.  I just purchased a newer one than is water based, not oil based.  I’m not totally convinced it is as good as the other one yet, but it does a pretty good job of covering scars.

Facial scars can affect your life in many years.  People stare at the scars instead of at you when they talk, it is like they are talking to the scars.  You feel like you are very ugly and it affects your self esteem.

Many children and adults live with disfiguring scars from diseases, surgeries and injuries.  Many of them can be happy that they still have a life, because they have cancer or had horrific accidents.  Many people live in rural areas and other parts of the world where they cannot get help.

I would love to have plastic surgery on my face, but I can’t justify it financially with so many other things are going on in the world.

If you find a way to help children like this, through a charity, etc., please do it.  You will change their lives.

 

The Richmond Coliseum is a disgrace.

I know the facility has been around since 1971.  I remember watching the opening of the Coliseum on TV.

The Richmond Coliseum phone number(s) apparently don’t work.  I tried calling the numbers listed on their website in various places (including the number to call to purchase box seats).  The phones rang and rang and rang.  There was not even a message that came on to acknowledge you called the Coliseum.  Shouldn’t a public venue like the Coliseum have a recorded message at least for the public to call.  The message could be press whatever for location address, for when the Coliseum will open before an event, like which entrance can be used for disabled ticketholders, etc.  That would be professional.  At least movie theaters’ phones will tell you that type of information.

My husband, previously from another state, had never seen the Coliseum before and wanted to know where it is.  He drives in Downtown Richmond all the time for his job, but obviously not by that building.  I told him to look for the flying saucer, because that is what it reminds me of.  The Coliseum is conveniently located if you are traveling from the airport direction, I-64 heading west, into Downtown, at the 5th Street Exit.  Whether it is marked with signage on the streets or not, I don’t remember.

The parking garage next to the Richmond Coliseum and across from the Richmond Convention Center is conveniently located and is well lit.  It is $6 for event parking, not too bad.  Fortunately, there was not an event at the Convention Center so there was adequate parking.  The problems with the parking garage – which I realize is not the Coliseum or maybe not associated with the city – it could have a commercial operator, are:

1) the exit doorway by the elevator at ground level is not handicap accessible.  It should have a ramp.

2) that area outside of that exit is not well lit, or even lit, it was so dark I can’t remember.  Again, the pathway etc. is not good for wheelchairs, etc. and it leads directly to the steps of the Coliseum

Again, I realize that the Coliseum was built back before the disability laws about designing buildings, accessibility issues.  However, it has been 20 years since those laws started getting put in place.  Somehow in 20 years I believe Richmond should have made changes to the main event venue for the region.

As a disabled individual who uses mobility assistance products, if I want to go to an event at the Richmond Coliseum, I have to go through Ticketmaster as suggested by the Richmond Coliseum website.  You fill out a request form to obtain ticket(s) for disability seating.  You are only allowed a maximum of two tickets, one for the disabled party and one for the person attending with you.  They will email you to let you know if there are any seats available and give you the specifics of the location.  You get to decide whether you want the tickets or not and you respond.

The problems with getting tickets:

The disabled person and his/her “friend” will have to pay the maximum ticket rates because you will be seated at club level seating.  You have no choice at all, you either pay the maximum rate or you don’t attend.

When you look on the Coliseum website at the club level information, it appears that you are sitting in a private suite with relatively comfortable looking seating.  You are not shown what it actually looks like.  More on this later.

You have to place your request months in advance in most circumstances because there is very very limited space for you.

For one event, I was told by Ticketmaster that the Richmond Coliseum doesn’t provide seats for the disabled.  Apparently it depends on which representative you get from Ticketmaster to respond to your request. What that representative told me though is closer to the truth than not.

If you have a family you want to attend the event with, too bad.  Your children or whoever will have to sit in the stand seating, separate from you.  You may not be able to control where they sit, depending on availability of tickets.  If it is you attending, your spouse and your family, neither you or your spouse will be able to be with your children in the stands.  This is a public venue with thousands of other people.  I wouldn’t want my son (when he was younger) to be separated from me.  No sane parent would want these circumstances.

What you experience when you show up at the Coliseum:

Parking issues regarding accessible exit/entrance from parking lot, condition of pathway, not well lit area, etc.

The parking garage next to the Coliseum leads directly to stepped entrances to the Coliseum level.  You have to go around to the front 5th St. area of the Coliseum to get to level ground.

The entrances to the Coliseum on 5th St. are apparently not opened as an entrance during certain events, I don’t know about all events.  This means that if you are on that side, you have to go around to the side entrances.  This doesn’t sound like such a big deal if you are walking.  If you are in a wheelchair, scooter or even use a rollator/walker, this is different.  The ground isn’t level.  Having to travel on bricks or unlevel surfaces give mobility devices a lot of wear and tear, and that doesn’t count what it does to the person in that device.  The disabled person has to go further than others.

You went to the trouble to get around to level ground to get up to the Coliseum level.  The crowd/lines now extends down the steps.  There is not a separate line for the disabled, like at several venues I have been to.  You are at the mercy of the crowd or your “friend” to hold a spot in line.  If you are using a rollator/walker, it may be very difficult for you to even wait in line due to a back problem, etc.

You go through the entrance.  One person is checking your bags, maybe running a scanning device around you.  The person who did this with me had an aggravated look on his face when he saw I was disabled.

We had to ask for assistance as to which side we needed to get to for our section.  The last time I was in the Coliseum was 1976, I don’t remember too many details.  We went off to the side directed.  I saw a restroom so I went in, I have never seen such a small public bathroom facility.  The restrooms at my doctor’s office are larger than this entire restroom.  The disability stall was the first one in, which is good because I could not have gotten my mobility device any further in because the hall from the bathroom stalls to the sink were too narrow to even get further, let alone not plow over women standing at the sinks.  The door to the disability stall was the width of the hallway.  If I opened the door fast enough, it could have smacked someone in the face.  It was difficult to get to the sink and wash my hands.  I don’t know what someone in a wheelchair would have done at all.

We continued on, and at that point you either have to take stairs or a narrow pathway.  We took the narrow pathway.  We got to the area where we were supposed to be (according to the signage).  We found out we had to take a somewhat small elevator to a higher level, club level.  You enter a larger area, see restrooms (nicer and larger, still a bad design) and entrances.  We opened the door and we were directed to another doorway.  Let me say at this point, everyone we stopped to ask for assistance from, that worked in the facility, treated us like we didn’t belong in the club level.  We entered the club bar entrance, and we were told I would have to use the “lift.”  A “lift,” really?  What does that mean?

The lift:  There is a lift operator who works it from the outside, on both levels.  A one person with your mobility device gets in the “box.”  The person with you has to use the steps to go up to the level, separate from you.  The lift box has an open top.  It moves incredibly slow upward.  You get to the level you are supposed to be at and the operator opens the door for you.  You exit and she points to the open walkway before the railing in front of you.  She hauls a chair over for my spouse and tells me she is going to take my mobility device and that we have to squeeze down as far as we can and close together because there will be other people next to us.  We were the first ticketholders to come to that walkway section of seating.  I had elected to use my rollator without the seat and with larger wheels and smaller profile, because I didn’t know what we would be facing at the event.

I refuse to let anyone to take my mobility device ever ever ever.  It is the same as my legs.  We immediately leave any place that insists that I give them one of my mobility devices.  It takes up less space than a highchair (in a restaurant) or a wheelchair.  I told her we would be leaving if she takes my device.  She wasn’t happy.  It folds up and I always fold it up.  I put it as tight between my husband and I as I could, in front of us.  Because of what she said, my 6’2″ husband that to practically ball his legs up, he just had meniscus surgery. If I was in a wheelchair, I would not have any choice as to what size “footprint” I took up.  The disabled are treated like 3rd class citizens.

Anyone who needed to get to the seats in the stands by us or below us had to go by us.  During the time we were there, there was a full row of disabled individuals with “friends.”  This is another factor, because each of the disabled individuals had to use the “lift” one at a time.  When you arrive, it is generally at different times.

I don’t know what they would do if you had a legal service dog and needed space for it.

In the middle of the long show, I realized I needed to use the restroom.  Guess what?  That would mean I would have to use the lift to go down to the level which most likely had a restroom, then you would have to go back up again.  We had been there through the first half of the event, and they had started the second half.  We had been there in the show (not the waiting time) for over 2 hours.  My husband asked me how I was doing and I told him I needed to go to the restroom.  He asked if I wanted to leave.  I told him it was up to him.  He knew that I hated the pyro effects they use (I am terrified of fire, especially in a public event and we were seated close enough to feel the blasts of extreme heat on our faces) and he grabbed our coats and we went to the lift.  The attendant was really nice now, that we were leaving.  It is good the concert was so loud, otherwise the lift would have been noisy.

Let me stop right here and explain something to you.  We had been members of a church in this area that is almost 200 years old.  That church had an elevator for the disabled to use, and you could get 3-4 people in it, and yes, 2 people in it with mobility devices.  The church retrofitted the building to have that elevator in it.  It was not a lift.  It is extremely disgraceful that the Coliseum does not have a real elevator for the disabled to use to get to see the show.

When the show is over, it is time for everyone to leave.  It is bad enough that you are in a mobility device and you have to try to get through a fast walking crowd of people who are swarming by you on their way out of the area to exit the Coliseum.  You also have to wait one by one to get down the lift.  So, that is another reason we left early, to avoid all that chaos.  We also left early to avoid the crowds on the way out.

We passed the front door entrance and we asked the guard if we could exit the building there.  All but one barrier gate was closed.  He asked if we were leaving and not coming back (the Coliseum has a no re-entrance policy), and we said correct, so he let us out.  We went back the way we had come to the parking garage.

Richmond is a very old city, with a lot of old buildings.  There are places I cannot go at all.  My husband has become more cognizant of what the disabled go through, because of what I go through.  He sees problem areas and what should be different for a disabled person.  He has become sensitized to the situation.  “Regular” people, who are not disabled or have regular contact with the disabled, do not understand what is required to deal with being disabled. Unfortunately, many of the newer buildings in this nation are not to the ADA and ABA codes and regulations.  Architects, interior designers and landscape designers should have to use wheelchairs and be in one for a month to understand what the disabled go through.  For that matter, so should the lawmakers and commercial property managers.

There is a lot of judgment about the disabled.  If you are obese, some people consider you are disabled because you are obese.  They do not realize that our health conditions and/or medications contribute to our weight problems.  I cannot exercise and workout like most people.  Yes, some disabled are extremely fit because of what they are able to do.  For various reasons, not everyone can function like those individuals.  I add this because of the judgments, but because as a disabled individual it can take a lot of energy out of you to go anywhere, let alone to a large public event like this.  You are worn out before you start the show.

A restroom needs to be on the same level as the disability seating for practical reasons.  Many disabled have problems with their bladder, for various reasons.  A person may have to go to the restroom a lot, may be incontinent etc. and needs access to a restroom without delay.  Some individuals in wheelchairs have catheters and don’t have to go through this as much, they have enough other problems.  In some cases, they do have catheters because they are in wheelchairs, due to the difficulties involved.

The disabled feel like a different class of people.  Remember another group that felt like a different class of people?  Remember the civil rights protests and demonstrations in the 1960′s?  The disabled are treated different.  We don’t have accessibility to some restaurants, doctor offices, grocery stores, etc. – places we have to go, let alone places for entertainment.  Maybe we are not supposed to have entertainment.  There are a lot of people who don’t think the disabled should be receiving Social Security Disability Income, that someone we are all losers and trying to live on the public welfare rolls.  Don’t get me started.

There is a growing revolution growing in this country, separate from the Tea Party.  There is a swelling wave coming about the disabled being a different class of citizens and being denied access to places we need to go.  We deserve the respect of being able to go where we need and want to go.

Some might argue that the disabled are being treated different because we want our own restroom stalls, ramps, special doors and devices, etc.  and that we should have to use what is there.  They say there is no comparison to the civil rights issues of the 60′s and that they didn’t have to spend extra money to build special things then.  Well, they did have separate things then in a lot of cases, separate water fountains, etc.  The civil rights of black Americans did cost citizens in a lot of ways, including more funds and more equality in schools, etc.  I am not saying anything against that.  The old ways were wrong.  The current ways are wrong for the disabled in the 21st Century.

My husband asked me what the disabled used to do.  The disabled stayed at home or went to a nursing home.  “Homebound” was the term that used to be used, and in some cases is used today by a segment of our society.

Being “homebound” today would end up costing a lot, especially with the increased number of war vets coming home who are disabled and the growing numbers of disabled baby boomers, not counting the disabled children or people who have other health conditions.  If you think there are a lot of costs to our health systems in the US now and a large number of obese people, you could probably double that figure if the disabled weren’t allowed to get out and do whatever they can do.  You would end up in a very inactive, less healthy condition, and that just makes things worse.  There would be growing numbers of suicides and other problems.

All of this is related to the issue of disability.

I implore the City of Richmond and all other citizens of this country to look at the disabled as individuals worthy of dignity and respect.

I implore all architects, interior designers, landscape designers, commercial building owners, lawmakers etc. to spend a whole month in a wheelchair and experience what the disabled experience.  I guarantee you there will be a lot of changes.

Don’t complain to us that any of the disabled are being unfair when we complain, when we protest, when we take you to court because of inaction.

Yes, I know new venues are expensive and we are in a depression.  Yes, I know selling bonds or using other methods of financing would be difficult right now.  I worked 10 years in the municipal bonds business in my “prior life” before disability.

I used to be a very active individual.  I used to hike, walk a lot, swim, do a lot of things I cannot do any longer.  It was extremely depressing to be at the Coliseum last night, to go through what I did.  Then to add to all of that, we used to live in two of the largest cities in the US and we used to go to pro baseball games and large concerts and events in much larger coliseums.  We had to often park a long long way from the coliseums, we could do all of that and then walk the interior of the coliseum without a winded breath.  We enjoyed the public events.  I was once involved in a major national event that took place at one of those much larger facilities and I had access to the entire building.  Part of what I was supposed to do was provide “security” and I walked and walked every inch of that building over and over and over.  It was extremely depressing to me that I could barely do what I did last night.

My life has changed, just like a lot of other people who are disabled.  We want to live not exist.

Oh, and don’t get me started on the use of pyrotechnic devices inside of a huge public facility, and especially to be a sitting duck as a disabled individual in that circumstance.

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on November 20, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

No Spam, Adult Content or Advertising Comments Allowed on My Website

Do not, I repeat DO NOT, leave any comments that are spam, advertising, vulgar language or adult content will be tolerated on my site.

Such comments will be deleted.  This is my website and I have final say over what is on my site.

 
 

Genetic Information Discrimination

The EEOC has issued final regulations on the employment provisions of the GINA.  The link I found is located at:  http://www.eeoc.gov/laws/types/genetic.cfm

It is important that everyone who is looking for work or is employed to look at the information that protects you and your family from your employer obtaining information about your genetic background, that could be used to “discriminate” against you for insurance and other purposes.  There are exclusions under this policy and you need to know what those exclusions are.  Information that your employer overhears from you about your family, etc. is open game.  You cannot be required to fill out family history forms that will disclose information about your family’s medical conditions – again, you need to see the policy and understand the exclusions. You also can’t be made to give “genetic” material – except in cases of exclusion.

Many people are concerned about having genetic testing to rule out diseases they may have.  I have had genetic testing and it came out negative for what they were looking for, praise God.  Most people do not understand how genetic testing works.  You can’t just hand them a vial of blood, so to speak, and have them run the genetic “works” on it, and hand you a list of what you have etc.  It doesn’t work that way.  They have to know what they are looking for in order to look for it.  Yeah, I know, but that’s the way it is.  You hear all this research about this chromosome does this and that and these are the defects etc. and you think they can run a panel and find out everything.  They can’t.  Even a test to find out one thing runs into the thousands of dollars.  You have to go through the approval process with your insurance and you may have to pay out of pocket until the lab gets paid by your insurance company.

Some family members may hold their hands over their ears when you find out you have this and that condition and it is genetic and does run in the family.  They don’t want to hear about it, trust me, I know.  Many people believe it is better to just not know anything, let the boogie man sneak up on them.

This policy also prohibits harassment at work for genetic conditions.  I don’t quite get this, but maybe you find out you have Aspergers or Bipolar and it is genetic (using for conversation purposes), and the people at work start harassing you, maybe the boss starts treating you differently etc., that is illegal.

You can sign up to receive email notices from the government on a large number of topics.  This topic of policy was taken from an email from the disability.gov website people.

 

Genealogy and Sense of Humor

You have to have a sense of humor when you are involved in genealogy.  You can imagine someone pouring over volumes of computer data at home and over old papers at a courthouse and think it is so boring.  That would be far from the truth.

First, you need to prepare yourself going into genealogy that you do not know anything about your family.  You also need to pull up any memory of family stories and tuck those aside, keeping the juicy details until later.  If you think your family has a pristine history and no skeletons, well that just doesn’t happen.  Remembering those little bits and pieces of stories told to you as a young child will go a long way to helping you in your detective work.

Hopefully you will be interested in genealogy before everyone that can give you detailed information passes away.  Sadly that just doesn’t happen most of the time – most of the time it is the older generation who are trying to piece together their backgrounds for the younger generation.  If you are fortunate enough to have parents, grandparents etc. still living, record their stories.  Keep all of their letters and photos.  Have them identify people in old family photographs and ask them about their families.  There are endless questions you can ask your older family members.  Don’t forget to ask about those funny stories, the black sheep of the family, etc.

My husband’s mother thought that everyone who went to Texas when she was growing up was hiding from the law.  They later ended up moving there, which is ironic.  Her ideas about Texas came from somewhere, some tidbit she overheard growing up.  My grandmother rode through Texas a few years before I was born and all she remembered about it was how desolate it was except for those blue flowers; the bluebonnets as they are called.  My grandmother remembered attacks by Indians which you wouldn’t think was still happening.

I could not remember my grandmother’s maiden name and didn’t think I would ever come up with it.  After raking my brain (instead of racking) I remembered my aunt talking about her uncle and his last name was “X.”  So I researched that and sure enough it was my grandmother’s maiden name.  That little tidbit opened an ocean of information.

I never knew my mother’s father and apparently she didn’t know him very well.  I don’t have all the answers, but it appears that he took out on his own after the depression and left my grandmother and his children behind.  It has been very difficult to get information on him.  I have the information on his WWI enlistment record, but the WWII enlistment record is somewhat of a mystery.  The WWII enlistment record shows he is black; the WWI enlistment record showed he was white.  I have to assume that is a big error since both records reflect the same birth date.  My grandmother would not have married a black man at that day and time and there’s no reason to think otherwise.  I know when he died, but otherwise the clues are gone.  I know information on his siblings as I knew them.  So, as you can see, finding one record with wrong information can make you laugh.  If it had been correct, it still would have been funny.

You find out a lot of secrets about people when you are researching their history.  It does feel like digging through their dirty laundry at times, but at the same time you have to know why you are doing all of this.  What is your priority and reason for doing genealogy?  Is it to just find out the family tree information?  Is it to find out medical information, especially if there appears to be a line of people with similar medical issues.  That is a valuable reason for doing genealogy.  Are you trying to get certified for membership in one of the prestigious heritage clubs?  The Mayflower, Jamestown, Daughters of the American Revolution, etc.?

You might find presidents and queens in your family history.  You might find outlaws and people of mystery.  You have to decide how you are going to handle all of that.  Are you going to be able to deal with the dark family history as well?

There are several types of genealogists.  There are the extremely serious ones, these are the ones that get certified in genealogy, do research for other people and teach people how to do genealogy.  They are also the ones that have the strictest guidelines for establishing your family tree.  They have documents, wills, birth and death certificates and even DNA information on their families.  There are people who are very focused on one family line and they get their DNA tested for that family line and they are defenders of the cause.  Don’t try to slip into the family line if you don’t have your DNA test results.  There are those that just want the basic information, research the tree on the internet however mysterious, correct or incorrect it may be.  They aren’t trying to get into anything with the information they find and it is more of a fun hobby.  I think this is probably a sane way to go.  There are many other types of genealogists.

I do have presidents, kings and queens and royalty of all sort in my family line.  I also have people – however famous they are – that I perhaps wouldn’t want in my family line.  I do have Mayflower, Jamestown and other ancestors that were good and bad, and probably indifferent.  Other members of our family in the past have gone the route to get into the fancy clubs and such, but I am not that type of person.  It is fun to talk about it, but it is also sad.  With all of the rich and famous ancestors we have had, in this generation we are all living paycheck to paycheck.  The mansions and plantations that used to be in our family lines are now in foundations and we get to pay to see the places just like everyone else.

You realize that each of us is somehow related to each other.  This world becomes a smaller place.  I have over 20,000 ancestors charted to date in my family lines.  I have also worked on my husband’s family lines.  We each have civil war soldiers who were captured, sent to Union prisons and the information on their ancestors died with them.  We each have what genealogists call “brick walls” – ancestors that you can’t get past, the trail runs cold.  You do have to have the instinct of a detective to do genealogy.  On my husband’s family line, I was working on one person going back to his ancestors and a “relative” in England contacted me about the same person, she was working back from the English line.  I have had other encounters like that in his lineages and in mine.

I have a couple of women in my family line that were something else.  They married and divorced and married and married and married.  Who knows if there were divorces on record or what because there is no indication of it.  Who knows what was going on in their lives that they chose to live that way.  One abandoned her children, ran off with another man, had a child, and then years later reunited with her other children.  I have found family history repeating itself over and over in ways that are too bizarre to even write down in public.

There are many details that just cannot be known.  Family Bibles are excellent sources of information and have been held to be a respectable documentation.  There have to be countless numbers of out-of-wedlock children listed as part of the family line; children who have been adopted but listed as of the family line; people listed as married or divorced but were neither.  There were men and women who traveled west in search of land, gold, just whatever, and they died along the way and buried in unmarked graves or marked graves that have long ago been destroyed or damaged.  Circuit preachers traveled to towns and often married, buried, christened, baptized, and they were killed or died.  Their records went who knows where.  Many courthouses and churches were burned or destroyed during wars or by other means, and the graveyards’ headstones destroyed, removed or neglected.  There are just so many uncertainties.

There is one area that bothers me today and that is the growing trend to have to have DNA test results to be included in a family line.  There are restrictions and ways that the testing does not work.  Even though I am a granddaughter of a female Surname, I cannot be tested as part of that Surname because I am not male and my last name isn’t that Surname.  The same goes for my husband, in that he cannot test as part of his mother’s family line because he doesn’t have that Surname.  The same goes for my father who doesn’t have his mother’s Surname, yet he was her son.  There has to be a straight and strict lineage of Surname, male to male.  Obviously, not all families have males each generation.  Yes there are some tests that women can take.  I did a DNA test on my maternal blood line to see if the lineages I found to date – with a lot of royal blood etc. – could be true, if the information was within the DNA lines and countries.  Surprisingly, it confirmed all of it.  The blood lineages in countries we never would have guessed but found through genealogical research was confirmed through DNA blood tests.

In my husband’s family line, there is an ancestor who, as the story goes, had an Indian and his daughter living on the guy’s property for some time.  The Indian approached the ancestor and offered his daughter in marriage for land and livestock in return.  Interesting.  This type of thing did go on just as interracial procreation/rape/affairs happened.  It is part of American history.

I am against illegal aliens today, but many of our ancestors did not come in as registered aliens or anything other than recognized citizens.  In early American history, a ship could pretty much harbor wherever it could and people get on and off.  There are many places that aren’t recognized today as previous immigration points.

Genealogy can be something you absolutely obsess about – you eat, drink, and breathe genealogy.  You have to take breaks, get away from it for a week or more, go back to it and start fresh.  You sometimes have to let it simmer, as on some individuals all you can do is wait for more information to be released or some other relative to fill in the blanks from their end.

I live in a southern state where many of the courthouses and churches were destroyed by fire during the civil war.  Researching some ancestors are next to impossible.  Because of that situation and the fact that some of my ancestors are rather famous, the bulk of the family records are in two main buildings in the capital city.  Instead of going to individual courthouses etc. to research those lineages, I have to go to the state historical society and state archives for information. The good thing about having famous people and royalty in your family is that the family lines have been researched over and over and the way has been paved, so to speak.  Whenever I find a lot of information on a family line too easily, I know there is royalty beyond the rainbow – and there is.

You gain a respect and an understanding of history through genealogy.  You will learn things about history that you would never learn through a school book.  You will also learn a bit more about what kind of people you are from.  That can go a long way to understanding yourself and your ancestors better.

 
 
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.